Unlearning to Relearn: The Hidden Step in Upskilling

Happy Monday, friends! 

Welcome back to #MondayMusing, where all month long we are unpacking the tools, mindsets, and moments that shape our professional growth. May is about Upskilling and today we are exploring a topic that is not discussed as much as it should: Unlearning. 

Yes, you heard that right. Before you sign up for another course or add a shiny new skill stack to your CV, here’s a bold truth: real growth often begins with letting something go.

The Courage to Unlearn

Many of us were trained in systems shaped decades ago. The structures we work in, how we design programs, write reports, or engage stakeholders are often built on inherited models. Some of those foundations still serve us. But others? They are silently holding us back.

Think about it. Have you ever sat in a meeting and realized that the way your team approaches a problem feels … off? Or the processes adopted echo a past that cannot seriously be applied to the present without being considered paternalistic, outdated, and simply inadequate? 

Unlearning is the process of naming and shedding those outdated mindsets, habits, or assumptions. No matter what industry you are in, you have probably come across ways of thinking or working that just don’t hold up anymore. In fact, clinging to outdated assumptions can cost you opportunities or even your job. That’s why unlearning is a critical part of upskilling: it clears the path for the skills and mindsets needed to stay relevant today and thrive tomorrow.

It’s not easy. In fact, unlearning often feels uncomfortable, even risky. but it is necessary if you want to create a resilient career. 

Letting Go to Grow

One of our Konseye community members recently shared how they used to believe that leadership meant always having the answers. As a mid-career professional managing large teams in a multilateral setting, they built a reputation on decisiveness and control.

But in the wake of the pandemic and the growing push for locally-led solutions, they began to realize that the best solutions often emerged when they stepped back and allowed others - especially local partners - to take the lead. They had to unlearn a top down mindset in order to relearn collaboration.

That shift didn’t happen overnight. It took honest reflection, difficult feedback, discussions with their mentor, and a few moments of sitting in meetings with more questions than answers. But today, their leadership is more authentic and more effective.

Upskilling is fundamentally about being adaptable, and true adaptability starts with taking a hard look at what habits, mindsets, or approaches we need to leave behind.

Ask yourself:

• What habits and mindsets did I pick up early in my career or during my studies that now feel misaligned?

• What assumptions about power, leadership, or expertise am I holding onto?

• What do I do simply because “that’s how we’ve always done it”?

If you are serious about growth in your career (regardless of your industry), these are the questions that matter.

Practical Ways to Start Unlearning

1. Name the Legacy Thinking: Pay attention to phrases like “this is how we’ve always done it” or “they won’t understand.” These are red flags. Journal or reflect on them. Talk to peers. Bring the outdated into the light.

2. Create Learning Discomfort: Choose books, webinars, or mentors that challenge your worldview. Discomfort is the signal that your mind is stretching and not a sign you’re failing. Check out “Think Again” by Adam Grant, which explores how rethinking is central to intellectual humility and learning.

3. Do a Personal Audit of Your Beliefs and Biases:Take time to reflect on assumptions you've carried for years. These might be about how work should be done, who holds authority, or what success looks like. Conducting a personal bias audit helps create a foundation for meaningful unlearning. A practical tool to uncover any unconscious biases is Harvard's Implicit Association Tests (IAT) to uncover unconscious biases.

4. Ask, Don’t Assume Next time you’re working with a community, a colleague, or a younger professional—ask more than you instruct. Assume less than you affirm. Listening is one of the fastest paths to unlearning.

Ready To Go Further? 

If you are really ready to unlearn old beliefs and make room for new ones, why not incorporate some of these into your  practice: 

Conduct a “Start–Stop–Continue” Practice Review

This method helps you evaluate your habits and approaches in a structured way. Take a current workflow, professional routine, or decision-making process and break it down:

• Start: What new behaviors or perspectives should I begin adopting?

• Stop: What outdated beliefs, routines, or assumptions are getting in the way?

• Continue: What’s still serving me and worth keeping?

  
  

How to do it: Set aside 30 minutes weekly or monthly. Use a whiteboard, journal, or digital tool like Notion or Miro to visualize it. Do this individually or with a trusted peer or team.

Reframe Your “Expert Identity”

Professionals often tie their value to being seen as an expert (that's what many are taught to strive for - expert status!). But this can become a barrier to learning. To unlearn, you must detach your self-worth from having all the answers.

Try these steps:

• Regularly put yourself in beginner environments (e.g., join a course where you know little, or a cross-sector learning circle).

• At your next meeting, practice not speaking first even if you have a ready answer. Listen fully.

Unlearning Begins with Humility

The professionals who thrive in today’s complex world are not the ones who know it all, they are the ones willing to rethink it all. Unlearning is not weakness. It’s leadership. It’s integrity. It’s the quiet, courageous work of freeing yourself from outdated baggage to make room for relevant and life-giving growth.

So this week, ask yourself:

What’s one outdated idea, habit, or approach I need to unlearn? 

Reflect. Share. Invite others into that conversation.

Until next time, Keep learning (and unlearning).

Have a great week,

Adejoké

Team Konseye